Animal lover and wonderful human being, Michael Vick, will not be appearing in this season’s Madden NFL 10 game. Although Vick caused something of a sensation by supplementing his meager NFL salary by running a dog-fighting ring, Electronic Arts claims his past crimes and total lack of judgement are not responsible for the exclusion.
“Once he signs with a team, we will work to get him in there, ASAP,” said a spokesperson for the sports game God-Beast EA.
We at Vox find this a curious state of affairs, since other unsigned players are in the game as a free-agent pool. We suspect, though, that Vick’s absence from the game is due less to any moral concerns, given that EA displays no moral qualities at all, and more to the fact that Michael Vick’s legal adventures have left the game maker with a lack of recent stat information to build his character.
On a more personal note, I’d just like to say, daaaaaamn. That dude has a big head. How does he fit that thing inside a helmet? I mean, it’s huge, a solid block of smiling gristle and flesh. Do they just paint the team colours across the side of his skull?
As of printing time, Michael Vick is still searching for an NFL team that will take an out of shape dog murderer.
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